The nightmare (5 & 16)

As I have described elsewhere on this site I suffered a nightmare when I was about seven while suffering chickenpox. the nightmare was of a woman who looked like my mother looking hate filled and judgmental toward me, ignoring my screams, in an arid flat bare landscape where only telegraph poles stood and which were all collapsing of beginning to collapse.

The look the woman had became a feature of my mother’s moods when she first started to lose her sanity at a time I would guess was close to the menopause for her.

(As an aside it is also interesting to consider that a when I was 30, a lecturer at the college where I was studying gave me a similar though much briefer look when I entered a lift with her. Later she wrote in her column in the Coventry Evening Telegraph, about the incident, saying that she had ‘clocked me’ and went on to rant about male desire. in fact I had just smiled because I recognised her from her photograph in the paper. Of course, my nightmare was about telegraph poles collapsing around a shirty mean looking woman, perhaps what in distant times may have been thought of as a witch ad she wrote in a paper called “Telegraph” and in a city which has a name akin to a witches  “Coven”. Also, as my mother was still downstairs watching TV when I had the nightmare it was also the ‘evening’ of the day and the rest of the city name is ‘try’ which can also mean put on trial, the lecturer having taken the course of a kangaroo court. I am not suggesting the lecturer was a witch, nor that people do not have the right to practice wicca as a religion, which from what adherents say, seems to be rooted in passions and desires rather than outright evil.

The fact that this happened after the incidents in 1977 detailed elsewhere on this web-site, where some Danes set me back on a course back to England and a somewhat inevitable controlled life, it is interesting to speculate why Northern Europeans, given what is happening in France are obsessed with spite towards each other. Muslims seem to consider each other brothers and sisters in religion.

Over the years of trying to come to terms with a woman, my mother, who tries her hardest when you are fourteen to make life difficult for you, nagging your father, slamming doors all the time, coming into rooms and saying a few angry words then storming out without allowing discussion of her problems. Who having all day to do it suddenly comes into a room when you are doing homework to noisily vacuum, who when you mentions the relatives you love dismisses any idea of contact, who tries to make you feel guilty for being born (I assume this was the reason) by saying “I could have been an actress” and nothing else when you return from school, who despite having no job lets the house turn into a tip, who says “shit” loudly at periods when you are within earshot, who waits until the males of the family are home before ironing and washing dishes making as much noise as possible while doing it, banging the iron down and clattering plates and who starts all this odd behaviour from the moment you come home from church choir practice, (a church she sent you to at seven years old), having begun to have difficulties described elsewhere in this site of getting strangely directed to see and hear things in the chancel which have all now seemed to be resolved by having Blair as British Prime Minister as though I was sacrifice for his career, my conclusion has been that my mother was about one third possessed, one third losing the plot and one third willfully antagonistic because things were not as she wanted them. This may also be partly why the lecturer attacked me in the press.

This shows how God preys on vulnerable families and especially children, in order to fulfil his ambitions of opposing science and reason.

My experience in Denmark, described in the page on my life after the bliss of enlightenment, led to a lack of sense or ability to reason in my brain characterised by phrases people said to me being repeated but often taking on a slightly altered sense. How does this relate to the nightmare you may ask. Well the nightmare was about poles collapsing. The girl in the middle at the festival I describe in the section on after bliss at which the Danish hippies/socialists decided to try to split my mind or send me schizophrenic if they could, was called Joanna Øbel which if you slur slightly sounds like Chernobyl, where the atomic splitting went all wrong. (Another example of this slight altering is that the one who wore the captain’s vest of the England and Manchester United football team was Beckham  eg Rebecca Ø Fest - Beckham vest. At a football match shortly after that pop concert I found my legs had gone and I could no longer co-ordinate to play football, despite having been reasonable enough to play some good football as a teenager - Beckham,  I have heard is Jewish by descent so it would amuse left wing Danes out to exploit one of God’s unwanted blind mildly tory innocents, to have controlled that and as a by product helped their friends at searchlight (an anti-nazi magazine) make Nazi sympathisers feel excluded from national Pride. As I have said elsewhere I am convinced that me saying “as a mater of fact Hitler was right” fairly soon after leaving church was God’s way of leaving a curse on me, a reason and logic preferring church leaver, but I am still surprised, thirty years later, that the Danes wished to push me back to that one point in my life which provides any God or devil or political opponent with so much ammunition against me). No murders in Denmark get executed by have had thirty years of various degrees of torture, from my body constantly aching, to exclusion from the ability to socialise, to terrors at night, for that statement alone as far as I can tell. I should at this point remind the reader that I am prepared to take a lie detector test about all this and face any tormentors including Jews, Danes etc I have named. But to continue, The name of the boy who seemed to get most advantage from my leaving church and my family security evaporating was called Darbyshire which again if you slur it slightly sounds like Dorbze (pronounced Dobsher) is polish for “good”. During this period of history after the festival in Denmark, a few popes suddenly died which led to a pope who was a Pole and by God or catholic definitions ‘good’. So the Poles would clap and sing (which sounds like collapsing) when he came to power as would many of other nations. The thing that adds to my belief that the Koran is true “Allah deceives whom it pleases him to deceive” is that the consequence of it all, is that left wingers lost the political arguments as did hippie laziness, yet Darbyshire was son of trade union members and had a brother who was communist and the people who tried to push me into insanity from Denmark were largely easy going left wingers too.

I have become as you might by now guess, convinced that my seven or so years in the church led to me becoming a slave to be deceived and victimised by those in the know, including a few intellectual British socialists, various religious practicers and a good number of Danes. This deception is by a number of techniques:

1. Gabriel’s dumping of the book “Koran”. 

2. Neural linguistic programming.

3. Some form of deliberately ham-fisted scientology/satanism , Denmark 1977.

4. Possession

5. Devil believer release (“we know when to release devils as the Koran says”)

Things that make me suspicious as examples below include:-

  • (example 1) downhill in Cheadle Hulme with the, perhaps unwitting but instinctual assistance of Darbyshire
  • (example 2) via church preaching, praying and singing
  • (example 3) the penetration and dividing of the human mind at the Rebecca Ø Fest in Denmark
  • (example 3 and 4)the penetration of a spot in the human mind to induce doubt, and indecision as after I punched a Jewish boy who stuck a pin in me (which I have to admit could be Jewish devilry or someone trying to frame Jews)
  • (example 4) my nightmare as a child suffering chickenpox (which could have been to turn my head incestuous or to turn me against my mother and could be linked to future politics and religion of Poland)
  • (example 5) Larry,the Amsterdam resident, Hell’s Angel sneaking up on me after a night of extreme pain (which could be him being an archetype of evil, likely as he knew so much about me, like Sven the ‘Troll’ Dane, or could be Christians trying to frame sexually liberated people.

It may be wrong in a philosophical sense to blame these incidents on these people involved, since in the animal kingdom everything is about survival and they could be said to be just doing it because it is in their nature. They then can of course claim that it is I who have brought shame into their gardens, like the serpent did to Eve and Adam, because I am accusing them. This convenience is their non-buddhist, Darwinist attempt to identify a cause of their suffering, namely guilt. It is like a big fish saying he ate the little fish because the little fish was making him feel guilty about being hungry. However, civilisation, especially western civilisation, depends on a degree of co-operation and assistance to others and while for instance the Danes could be said to be co-operating I could in theory have tortured one of them after and when they pleaded for me to stop just said, “stop trying to make me feel guilty.” Their is something ironic about the Danes behaving in ways which would inspire the Spanish Inquisition, but perhaps they saw that in the future, liberality and open borders, plus their own lack of desire to take responsiblity for survival by having children, would lead to a gradual build up of Islamic peoples in Scandinavia which some future generations might want to get rid of. Personally I can only speculate that as I believe Germany was tricked into destroying Jews so might a future generation be tricked into attacking Muslims, but such an attack might take place without Danish co-operation, outside Denmark, as in the case of Nazi Germany against the Jews, as the Danes want to remain Allah’s little anonymous helpers in deceiving everybody. 

Jesus said “man cannot live but by every word that comes from the mouth of God” but I would say that if Buddha or another god had not enlightened me prior to these attacks as described in the page on Bliss, then I would have died of insanity or a broken heart or stress due to the burdens of blame being placed on me.


The lesson then is God will stop at nothing to fulfil his aims of deceiving everyone about science and Buddha, rewarding people for doing evil to another (so be careful, the friendliest can turn nasty when offers or deception come along). Why those of the late sixties early seventies love generation of Denmark turned to what I can only believe has made inevitable enclaves of Islam across Europe, fuelling what may be a future pan European Balkans situation while permitting Islamic countries to continue with undemocratic conservative theocratic politics I will never know. I am certain the Danes in question know where I live now as they knew where I was and what I was doing and even thinking in 1977 so if you ever meet them you could ask them. If you do not believe this check out the page on France


A secondary lesson is that words may be not what they appear and words one chooses to describe things may not be all you think they are. Accurate perception in science and seeing through ordinary perception in illusions and dreams and nightmares are important. Hasty conclusion is counter productive.


I should emphasise this is not any slur on sincere Islamic believers, (as opposed to those who are using it as a means to extend their Darwinistic and tribal ambition against other peoples and cultures), or the majority of Danes since I have turned to religion at periods since then to try to find answers. In many ways I am better placed not to need that having experienced a sort of nirvana bliss and also it would be wrong to point the finger at every Dane, especially as I know of at least one who studied Buddhism when I was there in 1977, who told me, without any hate in his heart, that some of the Danes we met as we walked the street chatting were not the best of characters.

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