After Bliss

This is the Lemony Snickett page of this web-site (read a book by this author or see a film to understand what I mean). The basic theme of the Snickett books is about living happily ever after not being always the end of stories. So similarly, I would like to tell you a story of a little innocent boy who accidentally happened on the enlightenment of the Buddha and travelled the world revealing this to all who would listen and lived happily ever after. Sadly I can’t.

The story from now on gets much darker. In terms of the theme of this web-site, Buddha and Darwin, I write this as a warning to anyone who reaches enlightenment, that immediately you do that, all the powers in the world, Satanist and Godly, but not all humans by any means and certainly not animals, who are largely innocent, begin to turn against you. The trick is that, because enlightenment is the extreme opposite of understanding of Darwin, it is easy for God and Satan to say “Let’s now encourage Darwinism among all those the enlightened one meets”. This is legitimate to them because survival should be important to us. It is God’s idea of justice against Buddhahood and Satan’s idea of everything in excess. So a Buddha, after reaching Nirvana, will become surrounded by people, variously in touch with God or Satan who are all determined to deny the enlightenment, drain it from him or her etc. (to imagine this process of draining imagine you have two brains co-existing like colours merged on a computer screen which are then pulled apart and one is taken away leaving one just with the single colour, purple becomes red and blue is taken away, for instance).Equally I would suggest, though as having no children I cannot say I have experienced it, that atheists who have large families and are interested only in survival of their genetic line, (like Genghis Khan who is reported to have millions of descendants across China and central Asia.), will find themselves surrounded by Godly and Satanists in their guise as Buddha substitutes. Islam claims Allah is the compassionate one etc., Christians will preach the parts of Jesus’s teachings which resemble Buddhism. In other words you will be assaulted by attempts to make you a Buddha denier and perhaps too a genetic failure, dragging children, genetic inheritors of the world of their parents, to their doom, as the preacher at Waco in Texas did.

This may be why the 9th September attack occurred on the World Trade Centre, a building full of lots of successful people, many with families, but not totally devoted to God. The objective of the attack then is probably to focus people on reconciliation with Allah’s teachings. It may be seen as a tool for reconciliation between Islam and Christianity but against aetheism. President Bush and Tony Blair for instance have repeatedly stated this is not an anti-Islamic crusade, but are they both anti- Darwin? I would say yes if they can get away with it. Are they both anti-Buddha? I would say yes as they are pro-materialism. Look how wealthy they both are and how their politics depend on encouraging materialism. They want everyone to see the price of everything but the value of nothing.

Some quotes from people when all these events kicked off are give in the page below. It may be best to read this page first.


The first dark incident I will only touch on at this point as it is probably not important in terms of the suffering others experience. Others suffering is important both in terms of Buddha and, as we are a gregarious species, in terms of Darwinist thinking

 One night, while working at the Titan youth hotel in Copenhagen in 1977, I woke in an illusion with what felt like a hot stilleto knife boring into the back of my brain

This pain happened the night after I had escorted an American girl staying at the hotel to a church she wanted to visit near to the free city of Christiania on the island just over the harbour from the main city of Copenhagen. (Those who know Copenhagen will know it as the church with the peculiar twisted spire). The American girl came back to the hotel and we went to bed but the chemistry of love-making had gone and it was not very pleasant for either of us.

The next morning I rose and went to get breakfast upstairs in the hotel and a rather fat American, who I was later to learn had some share in the Hell’s Angels/Rocker cafe Amsterdam in the red light area, walked up behind me and said “Get a fuck Nick”. This was someone I had never met before so how he knew my name and what kind of greeting he thought that was I do not know. One could suspect that he and his companion, who arrived in Copenhagen that year in a white MG midget, were on some mission against me and a list of who said what after this night is given here. His name was Larry Vatsndahl, (the surname may not be spelt correctly). his friends name I do not recall.

I cannot write much more about that incident at the moment because much of it is conjecture if I started to link the illusions or hells I found myself in and the presence of  these two men. If it linked to anything I have written of in the page “The Omega course” then it is to the Koran I would turn to where Gabriel reports to Elijah “We know when to release devils”. The devils could have been  my Hell’s Angel or they could just be anarchists in God’s eye and he may have actually been the cause of my pain. As I could not see the force driving the pain into a location which felt like my hypothalmus (but of course the brain feels no pain), then as I have said I must leave the incident.


The next incident was within a few weeks from then . My relationships with the Danes around me had deteriorated through misunderstandings and perhaps the enlightenment I had experienced enabling me to act in ways which they felt were inappropriate. (I have of course no idea whether my behaviour was worthwhile or appropriate to whatever enlightened me or touched me, even if it was God). Certain people started to take an interest in me even though I have never met them before. Two in particular stand out. One was called Sven and ran a small vegetarian shop in on the north central side of Copenhagen. I walked into the lounge of the Youth Hotel and he was standing there. He was a particularly strange looking man who again I had never met before, he said “Be quick and see, just for a joke”. Shortly after that, perhaps a day later, Charlie, another more hip and good looking Dane to my eyes arrived one evening into the lounge as I sat there, becoming increasingly confused at the comings and goings at the hotel, since neither of these characters paid to stay at the hotel or were employed by it. His name I know because Sven called out an acknowledgment of him as he arrived maintaining focus on me.

Some days later these two and some Danes I had worked with were off to a one day free concert on the outskirts of Copenhagen called “The Rebecca ø fest”.. They looked all innocent when I called out of the window of the hotel “Do you mind if I come?” They agreed, but let this be a lesson to all. I wanted to go perhaps because I had loved the free concerts every Sunday in the big park in Faelled Parken, Copenhagen, not least because of all the topless women, (it’s not Playboy, it’s more relaxed and beautiful than that). I wanted to go perhaps because I was becoming increasingly confused about what was happening around me. I wanted to go because I may have felt lonely and certainly doing nothing, as I would have at the youth hotel which by now was closing for the summer was becoming very trying. But why I wanted to go and what they wanted were two completely different things.

At the free concert something happened which still affects me now. This you will find probably more unbelievable than anything you have read elsewhere in the Life-Class web-site.

I walked over to a position directly in front of the middle of the stage but some way back and just in front of the mixing desk, and sat down to listen to the music. Joanna Øbel, who had worked at the hotel, reclined behind me but I took little notice, Sven and Charlie sat crossed legged either side of but in line with Joanna, slightly behind me. Also near the front of the stage and to the left as I looked had moved Leonard Jørgensen who had also worked at the hotel, (he was the son of the then Prime Minister, Anker Jørgensen). I was sitting on the ground looking at the stage, though I had not since a young child ever been able to get comfortable in the lotus position so my legs were splayed out rather awkwardly. When one of the bands was playing I felt Joanna’s foot press, like a foot on a car accelerator, on the area of my left kidney and it felt bizarrely as though she was shifting something inside and perhaps out of me. I was not on drugs at this time, I should emphasise. As the members of the band started to move from side to side my brain seemed caught up by something. I have tried to describe this to myself in the decades since but the nearest I can come is using two analogies. The first is that my brain or consciousness (perhaps consciousness other than the brain is the best description, because as I have said I had already felt one night a stilleto in my brain which in medical terms is impossible), was like a piece of gammon steak on a bacon slicing machine. The other is that I was like the girl on a particular Tarot card, (only in some sets of tarot I believe), which I believe is the devil card. The picture card shows a girl on the ground with a giant Satan over her tormenting her mind.  A number of things went through my mind, primarily noticing people I thought I recognised but were not quite as I had know them and the other was series of absurd phrases matching the observation. The aim of this black magic or amateur scientology call it what you will, even Christian exorcism, was to make me make a choice. The words in my head at the crucial point prior to me making a decision were “To the left or to the right. For a joke or for love. (remember Sven had said to me “Be quick and see just for a joke” and he was on my left.) Then I noticed a girl wearing a Trilbey on my right whose head movement seemed to be seductive as the hat bobbed around, like a whore, or a wife giving a come-on. Eventually, within about a minute or less, I was totally unable to get this indecision out of my head and persuaded myself to fall to the right “for love”. Immediately I looked to Sven and he looked at me as if I had deserted some long lost buddy to a torturer. This went on for a few seconds before he took off striding off towards the back side of the stage, originally on my left. Charlie had grabbed my shoulders, which was a revolting feeling, like having all the peace you had ever hoped for taken from you. I was feeling guilty for being identified by these Danes as someone who needed this kind of treatment and I was feeling guilty for abandoning Sven, (don’t ask why as I had never met him but I believe that was just a product of the compassion being ‘touched by Buddha’ had given me or released in me). Thoughts in my head at this stage were of the type “ Oh no, I have rejected the man who first invented the joke” This inappropriate hold by Charlie just added to the guilt and feeling of being raped. Charlie then said “Yes they’ll try and fool you, love!”. Which sounds great but, considering there was no reference as to who ‘they’ are, although I have tried hard over the years to imagine these Danes meant well, I can only assume now, was intended to add paranoia to my confusion. In that to some extent they were successful in the coming years.

He then said “Now why don’t we talk........” and broke mid-sentence. This stopping mid sentence was again I would assume now a trick to imply that he felt he could still reject me, even though I had chosen his side, because I was not up to his standards. He could always claim he was a love God and felt he could see I resented him touching me and telling me what was right, which I did.

I imagine if I had chosen the other side a similar thing would have happened. Sven would have said “Yes just for joke, they’ll try and fool you” and Charlie would have tried to make me feel guilty for rejecting love.

At this point it was obvious they had known my thoughts through some kind of telepathy or perhaps as a result of the stilleto pressure which had caused me such pain one night earlier in the summer leading to an open mind which others could tune into.

In the days that followed Sven exhibited what I can now best describe as the mentality of the paedophile in the pilot show of “The Shield” an American police series. I visited his shop searching for a answer as to why they had done this to me and asked “Have you got any jobs available?”. This may have been an instinct to preserve my sanity since it directly confronted the idea of whether or not he intended me well since he would answer “I’ll see what I can do” if he had good intent even if he did not himself have work available. Instead he denied he had any, talked of having two girls who were working for him and said “Oh but I can wait a long time for a fuck”. On various visits to the hotel after that and on other occasions when he was around he said “Don’t worry soon everything will be warm or hot” and “We have an expression in Denmark, ‘Nick, Nick, boater Nick in Charlottenlund’. Charlottenlund is the area just north of Copenhagen where there is an aquarium. These seem like classic control expressions that “The Shield” pilot show showed to be the way people trying to hide things act. I have only just taken sufficient notice of this series, 28 years after the time these things were done to me, to encapsulate what I feel.

Please don’t feel I am trying to condemn Denmark or Copenhagen. I met some beautiful people there. Those last few weeks though I seemed to meet all the crap. Leonard, the son of the Prime Minster had already started on me before this festival, As someone at the time considering the issue of vegetarianism, since the hotel only served veggie food, I asked him when I saw him eating a Danish hot dog, “Why do you eat meat?”. This infuriated him and he angrily replied, “I eat what I like!”. few others in the hotel did eat meat so I wonder sometimes what he would have said had one of they asked the same question. After the festival though he really started laying into me. One evening in the office of the hotel, after the festival incident, I was feeling reasonably sane but he just stood in the door way and said three times, “I’m sorry”. “I’m sorry” with a smirk on his face, “I’m sorry” in an assertive manner, “I’m sorry” like a judge secretly pleased as pie with a verdict of death by a jury. Three times obviously not actually being sorry at all, probably more the sort of thing he would say to a factory farmed pig as it was led to the lorry going to the slaughter house.

   The reason I have raised the drama of the pilot episode of “The Shield” is that in that, when two conflicting theories on how to extract, from the paedophile, the information as to where a missing child may be is being debated, the chief of the station realises that one way he feels would be certain to succeed is to let the anti-hero of the show, the leader of the police special unit, spend sometime beating the truth out of the paedophile. The paedophile is convinced he has rights to a lawyer and that the other police will have a conscience about what is happening to him. The information does get extracted by my hero, the anti-hero.( I have to be sure here that the reader understands that this is because the victim is a child in great or imminent danger. Operating outside the rule of law by police forces is something that in all other circumstances I would discourage).

I believe that if special investigators from any country on earth went to Denmark and found these people I mention, then took from them their rights, as they took from me mine, those investigators would discover things about the way the world is and why it is that way that would astonish them. There is of course the possibility that God, eg Allah, may have offered these few Danes some deal which would tempt any investigators too so I would have to rely, by writing this on the web-site, on these people being as incorruptible as Elliot Ness or as concerned that what the paedophile had done to the little girl might be done to his or her own daughter, as the ant-hero was in ‘The Shield’

Shakespeare in his play written about a prince of Denmark, Hamlet, did say “There is something rotten in the state of Denmark”. I have concluded the same after decades without a sincere apology for all the years I have suffered since 1977. It is a small but no doubt influential group, coven, call it what you will.

Strangely also at this period a Jewish looking man came downstairs in the hotel in Copenhagen, (this is after the hotel had closed as it was only open during the summer) and looked at me as if he resented something about me, my peace of mind or whatever. Now as I look back 30 years later, Islamic people are burning flags of Israel the USA and Denmark, (the latter because of some cartoons published). It would seem that the three main nations characters involved in attacking me for one reason or another after my enlightenment, Larry from the USA, a number of Danes and a Jew have become as provocative to Islam as they were to me. I wonder if in God and Satan’s rush to deny Buddha and Darwin, they have led all mankind into conflict. I would maintain , if mankind understood Darwin and Buddha and the implications of what they can teach us, then the conflict would not happen.






From Harwich to Newcastle:-

In Newcastle I visited my uncle and aunt but strange things happened which were to add to my confusion about people’s desires and motivations. I had had a vision including my uncle in a hotel in Nottingham on the way to Newcastle. For some reason I became obsessed with trying to convince my uncle that there was a spiritual dimension to life and that it is fascinating to be aware. Conversely I was later to realise it was a mistake to tell him as he became apparently obsessed with extracting any power I had to see the future or exist spiritually. (The book of Daniel states that God warned Daniel not to reveal anything that has been shown him in night journeys to anyone so perhaps there is some wisdom even in the darkest book of lies). I told him of the vision. Also my uncle had received a gift, (obviously an LP) from another auntie living in Devon. I told him before he opened it that it was Handel’s Water Music. He looked a bit taken aaback when that proved to be the case but made out as though he dismissed it. Later, in the days that followed he was to increasingly start playing a game as though he wanted to believe I was evil making comments like “Same as you did last time”  Indicating he was somehow fed up of a person who had revealed that such things can be.



[LIFE CLASS (9 &63)] [Fantasy and Science Fiction Analogies (4)] [Why Vegetarian (50 & 108)] [Working for Charity] [The Omega Course (23, 29, 34 & 35)] [Nudity (54)] [Brief Personal History] [Spiritual Journey] [The Early Years (12)] [Before Bliss (11, 40 & 59)] [After Bliss] [Books and music] [Conspiracy or  Delusion in Denmark (122)] [Christopher Hitchens 129] [Richard Dawkins 130] [Dolly Parton as a spiritual guide 131] [Feminist (5 & 69)] [The law (70)] [My genetic history] [Future thinker] [Physics, buddha and Darwin (55)] [Racism, Buddhism and Darwinism] [Are you deceived] [Humour (21& 32)] [Drugs and Alcohol (33 & 58)] [Changes and updates] [Madness (19 &26)] [Lament for Humanity] [Conservation and Biodiversity (49)] [Defence (43)] [Recommended Reading (60)] [What do you want? (73)] [Fundamental Principles (84)] [The Road to Enlightenment (91)] [Children (10 &109)] [Global Catastrophe in 40 years (111)] [Yidolatory (121)] [The letters (126)]